DO YOU REALLY WANT ADVICE?

So most times people ask for advice from other people but i notice most often times these people do not want your version of advice even though they may need it but really they do not want it.

What do i mean mean by "want" and "need"? Do not get confused;

People would ask you for advice on a certain issue e.g  if they should get another car, You then tell them 'No, you do not need this car because you already have a car, rather you need a house'  ( this is just an example).  Then they become sad and say to themselves, 'you would not understand because its not you wearing the shoe, you would not know where it pinches'.
In this case they may need your advice but they do not want it because they already have an answer , they just need you to affirm their decision.

Now the Question "Do you really want advice?" because most of us fall in this category.

If you want advice;

1. You must first accept that there is an issue that you need Advice on
2. Open up your mind
3. Ask people that are worth being mentor's (Not necessarily mentors)
4. Open up your mind again
4. Take a list divide it into two and draw up reasons why advice A is better than advice B on one side
5. On the second side draw up reasons why advice B is better than A
6. Pick the one that strikes the other Out
7. You do not necessarily need to like the winning advice
8. However if you still do not like the winning advice, take a RISK and go with what you feel better with
9. BLAME yourself ALONE for the consequences ( that is if the result is bad)

Make sure you kept an open mind all through.

Not all of them are Whores

I was at Church last week when a Single Lady was giving a Testimony of the fact that when she got back to Nigeria after Masters she did not have to wait up to one year before she got her dream Job that also provided her with a Car.
Some of her Friend's began asking her who the 'Maga' was but she smiled and said 'She serves a Living God'.

This gave me the thought that society may be a bit unfair to Single affluent Ladies, for one i know some of them in my Church that are affluent without having to do shady or nasty things to get there.

Just because some Single Ladies probably slept around for their wealth, does not mean every single mature lady living an affluent life is a 'Whore'.

I beg to disagree because i have met some of these Ladies and i know that they did not have to sleep around for Money.

Because of this outrageous thought, I know a lady who has refused to buy Car even know she earns well enough to have one just because she is young and does not want to be seen as a 'Whore'.

We should not be quick to Judge or Gossip about Single Affluent Ladies especially when you do not know their struggle story.

When your Opinion does not even matter

Have you ever been in a situation where someone that does not matter to you tells you he/she does not like your hair or cloth or outfit. Some that do not even matter will tell you to change your display picture just because he/she does not like it.

Well you might be that person that does not even matter so please before you make your opinion known to someone about their life, pause and think first if your opinion would matter to the person because the truth is it does not always matter.

Today's Inspiration NHN Couture

Nkechi Harry Ngonadi is the CEO/Founder of NHN Couture.

According to her , "NHN is a vision on a mission! Bringing decency back to church first and the society at larg! Covered yet sexy, fabulous, simply classy is her motto!" 

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What drove her initiative?

She realized how people admired her dressing in church. In fact, She got inspired with the way people call or send messages on social media seeking what to wear to a particular event, which she delightfully attend to. She helps them source for fabrics and direct them to the right tailors to design them. But God directed her last year to open a fashion outfit to promote decency.
Also, her creative style and colour combinations are drawn from her study as an Urban and Regional Planning graduate.

Take this:
She is a fashion designer like many others but she chose a path/line which is "Decent outfits". I have been opportune to look at a number of the outfits she designed and i must confess, they are impeccable.

You are a Lady..... Watch your Language

I went for an event some weeks ago. A topic was raised and every one was asked to give their opinion or contribute.

A lady got up and in trying to drive home the point she was making, she started using curse words and foul languages like 'f**k'.

I was ashamed for the Lady because i could not understand why a grown Lady like that could not control her language especially in a public formal gathering. Am sure if she watches the video she would be sad.

The truth is she might have not even known when she said it probably because she has gotten used to the words.

As a lady , its only right that you watch your language both in Private and in Public.

Describe your Ideal Man

The last time i spoke about a guy describing his ideal woman". I decided to ask some ladies same question. Answers below:

1. He should be rich
2. He should be ambitious
3. He should be romantic
4. He should be God-fearing

Then i asked the girl:
1. Are you rich? she doesnt even have a job
2. Are you ambitious? She has only a B.sc
3. list romantic things you did for your Ex? I couldnt get a straight answer from this.
4. Do you fear God, how often do you talk to God? A God-fearing woman does not lie and she communes with God regularly.

Most ladies want so much from a man, whereas they offer so little. I guess its the perception from childhood that a man should be everything while a woman should just know how to cook.

Ladies open your eyes, we are in the 21st century, Men love ambitious and focused women, Men love romantic women too.

Make your husband proud of you, be a strong pillar to the home and ask your God for directions and wisdom.

Remember All the Other things they did Right too

People often times annoy us, step on our toes or hurt our feelings and we have every reason to be angry or sad, However taking extremely rash measures is not the way to go.

Before you take a rash decision sit down and remember all the other right things they have done. Bad experiences hurt but do not forget the good experiences too.

1. Take a paper
2. Divide into into two with a vertical line
3. List all the things they have done wrong on the first side
4. List all the things they did right on the other side
5. Is the wrong experience something you feel they are genuinely sorry for and would not repeat
6.Which one outweighs the other? Make your decision based on that
7. Please note however that if this same wrong has been repeated a lot of times , then you might go ahead with your decision , again depending on the gravity

Describe your Ideal Woman

One day i was gisting with some friends and one 35-year old guy told me he really wants to settle down, then i asked him this question "Who is your Ideal wife". His answers below

1. She preferably should have a car
2. She preferably should be the last born
3. She should have a steady well paying job
4. She should know how to cook
5. Her father has to be a "somebody"

Then i asked him,
1. Do you have a car? of course i know he doesnt, he drives his company car
2. Are you the last born? No he is the 2nd of 7
3. Is your job well paying? he couldnt answer
4. Is your Father a somebody? well i dont know his father


From the above you see a man ready to gold-dig not a man ready to settle down. Most times guys of nowadays give lists of things they are not.
A real man takes full responsibilty of his home, Even flavour sang "To be a man is not a day's job"

Why is the wedding Ring worn on the 4th Finger?

This question has always been on my mind as to why the Fourth finger was picked for the 
wedding ring. Is it just because when the Presiding Priest says "In the name of Father, son 
and Holy spirit" it ends there?


Well that is not it, i investigated further and and became better informed.

 According to  a tradition believed to have been derived from the Romans, the wedding ring is worn on the left hand ring finger because there was thought to be a vein in the finger, referred to as the ‘Vena Amoris’ or the ‘Vein of Love’ said to be directly connected to the heart. 

Naturally, to solidify a union based on love, they'd place the ring on that finger that housed the vein of love to signify the romance the newly married couple shares. A pretty adorable physical representation of two hearts being connected

Today’s Inspiration- CHTIS BAKERY UNN

Chitis of today is a well-known Restaurant in University of Nigeria Nsukka, As a fresh student or visiting parent, the first Restaurant you are directed to in UNN is Chitis.

Why Chitis is an Inspiration?

My lecturer then in UNN, told me the story of how Chitis would bake bread and take to him and his colleagues doorstep. Gradually,  Chitis asked my lecturer to subscribe to a monthly plan such that he would be served hot- fresh baked bread daily. This was before they rented a shop and finally a space for their restaurant.

With Chitis we see determination and zeal, we see someone who loved to bake and wanted people to have a taste of her pastries.  After validating that people love and enjoy her bread, she went ahead to rent a shop and finally a space at University of Nigeria, Nsukka where they run their Restaurant.

She didn’t wait for funds to Rent a store before she started baking her bread; she started off as little as she could with hopes and dreams. She started off as a door-door bread distributor then upgraded to Chitis Pastries and finally became a Limited Liability company with outlets in Enugu, Nsukka and Awka.

                   

Currently Chitis not only bakes bread and pastries but cooks different kinds of Continental and intercontinental dishes. Also has a confectionery section where she makes Ice-cream, Cakes etc.

WHO DO YOU SAY YOU ARE!

Most times when you ask people to tell you about themselves, they begin describing what people have said about them....so i always ask this question "Who do you say you are?"

Sit alone, take a break, and ask yourself this question.
Define yourself, do not let people define you, define what you want to be , define what you want to achieve and then pray to your God to assist you in your definitions.