Relationship Deal Breakers

I have critically analyzed some relationship deal breakers, for you to know when to flee.

1.       They threaten you or hit you. Even if they say they are sorry. Even if it’s just one time. Don’t get me wrong, forgiveness is a good thing, but in my opinion you can forgive without having to still be in the relationship.

2.       They code most of their gadgets and you don’t have the password. Smooth players know how to be hideous even without hoarding their gadgets, however not for long. If in your face he/she prevents your access to his/her gadgets and some places in his/her house. C’mon, the sign is there.

3.       He/She flirts with other people even in your presence. That sour feeling in the pit of your stomach isn't going to go away easily and it's going to cast a pall over the entire relationship.

4.       He/she tells a lie.  This is a tough one. You've just caught him/her in a relatively small lie. Maybe he/she couldn’t visit because he/she was ill, but you later find that he/she went to hang out with friends. it's just one lie about something that really doesn't affect the grand scheme of your relationship -- it's nice to think that. Unfortunately, that's not the case. If she's willing to lie on matters of such minor importance, she's probably going to lie to save face when the question is more important. Lying, no matter the reason or the outcome, should always be a deal breaker for your relationship.

5.       He/she calls you stupid, slut, gigolo and those kinds of heavy abusive words. This shows his/her temper cannot be controlled. This is something you should put into consideration because a person that claims to love you should learn not to use those kinds on words on you.

6.       You have never met friends or family after months of courting. Haba! Are you a learner, my dear you are the side chick/guy if none of his/her friends and family has ever met you.

You Gotta Love your Job

             

What do you think? You spend 8-10hours at your job 5days a week and you hate your Job? You have to try to love the job or leave the Job.

The truth is you spend most of your life at work, more than the money you should try and be happy. Its disastrous working all 5days a week and being angry or sad all the time.

Reasons why you should Either Do what you love or just Love what you do;

1. You will be less productive both at work and in your life after work, because after work, instead of relaxing, you will spend the rest of your day complaining and ranting.

2. You will grow old faster. The saying that sad or angry people die younger is not far fetched.

3.Your career life may not improve, this is because you will end up doing exactly what you are told with no extra research, hence you will be good for the company where you work but not for another company.

Keep your Eyes on YOUR Girl

I must confess it is disrespectful to be on a date or an outing with a girl and be starring at another girl, Best bet is for you to break up and go after the other girl.

Sometimes when i go out , i see a guy with another girl starring at me or my friends, Even if she is your sister , she also deserves some level of respect from you.

More than the guy, i respect the girl that is still moving with that kind of man because to me i see it as outright Disrespect

The Music gets to you

People often listen to musics for fun and to relax. However more than the fun or relaxation, the music gets to you.

Little by little, the words get to you and you also get used to the words.

The more you listen to hate songs, the more bitter you get, The more you listen to break-up songs, the more you find faults in your relationships.

Gradually, you begin to act think like the musician and then act like the musician and maybe even dress like the musician.

Music influences us especially when the frequency at which we listen to it increases.

DO YOU REALLY WANT ADVICE?

So most times people ask for advice from other people but i notice most often times these people do not want your version of advice even though they may need it but really they do not want it.

What do i mean mean by "want" and "need"? Do not get confused;

People would ask you for advice on a certain issue e.g  if they should get another car, You then tell them 'No, you do not need this car because you already have a car, rather you need a house'  ( this is just an example).  Then they become sad and say to themselves, 'you would not understand because its not you wearing the shoe, you would not know where it pinches'.
In this case they may need your advice but they do not want it because they already have an answer , they just need you to affirm their decision.

Now the Question "Do you really want advice?" because most of us fall in this category.

If you want advice;

1. You must first accept that there is an issue that you need Advice on
2. Open up your mind
3. Ask people that are worth being mentor's (Not necessarily mentors)
4. Open up your mind again
4. Take a list divide it into two and draw up reasons why advice A is better than advice B on one side
5. On the second side draw up reasons why advice B is better than A
6. Pick the one that strikes the other Out
7. You do not necessarily need to like the winning advice
8. However if you still do not like the winning advice, take a RISK and go with what you feel better with
9. BLAME yourself ALONE for the consequences ( that is if the result is bad)

Make sure you kept an open mind all through.

Not all of them are Whores

I was at Church last week when a Single Lady was giving a Testimony of the fact that when she got back to Nigeria after Masters she did not have to wait up to one year before she got her dream Job that also provided her with a Car.
Some of her Friend's began asking her who the 'Maga' was but she smiled and said 'She serves a Living God'.

This gave me the thought that society may be a bit unfair to Single affluent Ladies, for one i know some of them in my Church that are affluent without having to do shady or nasty things to get there.

Just because some Single Ladies probably slept around for their wealth, does not mean every single mature lady living an affluent life is a 'Whore'.

I beg to disagree because i have met some of these Ladies and i know that they did not have to sleep around for Money.

Because of this outrageous thought, I know a lady who has refused to buy Car even know she earns well enough to have one just because she is young and does not want to be seen as a 'Whore'.

We should not be quick to Judge or Gossip about Single Affluent Ladies especially when you do not know their struggle story.

When your Opinion does not even matter

Have you ever been in a situation where someone that does not matter to you tells you he/she does not like your hair or cloth or outfit. Some that do not even matter will tell you to change your display picture just because he/she does not like it.

Well you might be that person that does not even matter so please before you make your opinion known to someone about their life, pause and think first if your opinion would matter to the person because the truth is it does not always matter.

Today's Inspiration NHN Couture

Nkechi Harry Ngonadi is the CEO/Founder of NHN Couture.

According to her , "NHN is a vision on a mission! Bringing decency back to church first and the society at larg! Covered yet sexy, fabulous, simply classy is her motto!" 

.

What drove her initiative?

She realized how people admired her dressing in church. In fact, She got inspired with the way people call or send messages on social media seeking what to wear to a particular event, which she delightfully attend to. She helps them source for fabrics and direct them to the right tailors to design them. But God directed her last year to open a fashion outfit to promote decency.
Also, her creative style and colour combinations are drawn from her study as an Urban and Regional Planning graduate.

Take this:
She is a fashion designer like many others but she chose a path/line which is "Decent outfits". I have been opportune to look at a number of the outfits she designed and i must confess, they are impeccable.

You are a Lady..... Watch your Language

I went for an event some weeks ago. A topic was raised and every one was asked to give their opinion or contribute.

A lady got up and in trying to drive home the point she was making, she started using curse words and foul languages like 'f**k'.

I was ashamed for the Lady because i could not understand why a grown Lady like that could not control her language especially in a public formal gathering. Am sure if she watches the video she would be sad.

The truth is she might have not even known when she said it probably because she has gotten used to the words.

As a lady , its only right that you watch your language both in Private and in Public.

Describe your Ideal Man

The last time i spoke about a guy describing his ideal woman". I decided to ask some ladies same question. Answers below:

1. He should be rich
2. He should be ambitious
3. He should be romantic
4. He should be God-fearing

Then i asked the girl:
1. Are you rich? she doesnt even have a job
2. Are you ambitious? She has only a B.sc
3. list romantic things you did for your Ex? I couldnt get a straight answer from this.
4. Do you fear God, how often do you talk to God? A God-fearing woman does not lie and she communes with God regularly.

Most ladies want so much from a man, whereas they offer so little. I guess its the perception from childhood that a man should be everything while a woman should just know how to cook.

Ladies open your eyes, we are in the 21st century, Men love ambitious and focused women, Men love romantic women too.

Make your husband proud of you, be a strong pillar to the home and ask your God for directions and wisdom.

Remember All the Other things they did Right too

People often times annoy us, step on our toes or hurt our feelings and we have every reason to be angry or sad, However taking extremely rash measures is not the way to go.

Before you take a rash decision sit down and remember all the other right things they have done. Bad experiences hurt but do not forget the good experiences too.

1. Take a paper
2. Divide into into two with a vertical line
3. List all the things they have done wrong on the first side
4. List all the things they did right on the other side
5. Is the wrong experience something you feel they are genuinely sorry for and would not repeat
6.Which one outweighs the other? Make your decision based on that
7. Please note however that if this same wrong has been repeated a lot of times , then you might go ahead with your decision , again depending on the gravity

Describe your Ideal Woman

One day i was gisting with some friends and one 35-year old guy told me he really wants to settle down, then i asked him this question "Who is your Ideal wife". His answers below

1. She preferably should have a car
2. She preferably should be the last born
3. She should have a steady well paying job
4. She should know how to cook
5. Her father has to be a "somebody"

Then i asked him,
1. Do you have a car? of course i know he doesnt, he drives his company car
2. Are you the last born? No he is the 2nd of 7
3. Is your job well paying? he couldnt answer
4. Is your Father a somebody? well i dont know his father


From the above you see a man ready to gold-dig not a man ready to settle down. Most times guys of nowadays give lists of things they are not.
A real man takes full responsibilty of his home, Even flavour sang "To be a man is not a day's job"

Why is the wedding Ring worn on the 4th Finger?

This question has always been on my mind as to why the Fourth finger was picked for the 
wedding ring. Is it just because when the Presiding Priest says "In the name of Father, son 
and Holy spirit" it ends there?


Well that is not it, i investigated further and and became better informed.

 According to  a tradition believed to have been derived from the Romans, the wedding ring is worn on the left hand ring finger because there was thought to be a vein in the finger, referred to as the ‘Vena Amoris’ or the ‘Vein of Love’ said to be directly connected to the heart. 

Naturally, to solidify a union based on love, they'd place the ring on that finger that housed the vein of love to signify the romance the newly married couple shares. A pretty adorable physical representation of two hearts being connected

Today’s Inspiration- CHTIS BAKERY UNN

Chitis of today is a well-known Restaurant in University of Nigeria Nsukka, As a fresh student or visiting parent, the first Restaurant you are directed to in UNN is Chitis.

Why Chitis is an Inspiration?

My lecturer then in UNN, told me the story of how Chitis would bake bread and take to him and his colleagues doorstep. Gradually,  Chitis asked my lecturer to subscribe to a monthly plan such that he would be served hot- fresh baked bread daily. This was before they rented a shop and finally a space for their restaurant.

With Chitis we see determination and zeal, we see someone who loved to bake and wanted people to have a taste of her pastries.  After validating that people love and enjoy her bread, she went ahead to rent a shop and finally a space at University of Nigeria, Nsukka where they run their Restaurant.

She didn’t wait for funds to Rent a store before she started baking her bread; she started off as little as she could with hopes and dreams. She started off as a door-door bread distributor then upgraded to Chitis Pastries and finally became a Limited Liability company with outlets in Enugu, Nsukka and Awka.

                   

Currently Chitis not only bakes bread and pastries but cooks different kinds of Continental and intercontinental dishes. Also has a confectionery section where she makes Ice-cream, Cakes etc.

WHO DO YOU SAY YOU ARE!

Most times when you ask people to tell you about themselves, they begin describing what people have said about them....so i always ask this question "Who do you say you are?"

Sit alone, take a break, and ask yourself this question.
Define yourself, do not let people define you, define what you want to be , define what you want to achieve and then pray to your God to assist you in your definitions.

Every Jewelry needs care

JEWELRY CARE

Jewelry are a girls' best friend and in as much as designers like macksita try to give you the best quality, these jewelries need to be catered for.

Please consider the following tips to prolong the lifespan of your macksita jewelry:

1. Do not jumbble your pieces in a drawer as pieces can scratch each other, Always store your jewelry seperately in individual jewelry box

2. Keep Jewelry away from chlorine, Swimming pools, salt water and perspiration.
3. Apply your cosmetics, hair spray and perfume before putting on your jewelry and whenever you remove your jewelry, wipe it carefully with soft cloth to remove any trace of these substances.
4. Do not store jewelries in plastic bags as they are not breatheable.
5. Always make sure your jewelry is clean and moisture free before storing
5. Jewelries should always be stored at room temperature.

EMPIRE, My analysis

I finally made out time to watch this seasonal series called "Empire" (yea! am busy like that).

So my take and perspective on the characters and the movie is kind of different.

Why are all the sons fighting for their dad's hustle? Empire is for Lucious and Cookie, so they better take their shares and bounce.

What is this Series teaching guys sef? How to chase people's hustle?

You are who your friends are

Last year August, I decided to make observations to know if  friends are really an influence in peolple's life, My answer is a big Yes!

I checked the lives of over 30people from august till date and it totally proves it.

Friends influence your life in ways you cannot imagine, if you have up to three close friends with the same perception, my dear your perception will fall in line with theirs.

Areas of your life your friends influence:

1. Career and Aspirations: when you build relationships with people who have succeeded, you find a mentor and climb the ladder of success. However if you relate with the "anything-goes" kind of individuals, your aspiration then becomes "anything-goes".
If you associate yourselve with entrepreneurs, you then strive towards being an entrepreneur.
Assessment: look at the friends you have and their career path, i bet its almost then same with yours.

2. Eating and drinking habits: Ever notice that when a "non-drinking" guy hangs out with drinkers, he is forced to drink.
when a "no-sweet tooth" girl hangs out with her sweet tooth friends she is forced to eat along.
Assessment: Think about it, most times you go out with your friends, do u eat what you want or what you are tuned to want?

3. Relationship: If your friends are cheats, you will one day succumb to cheating. While your friends may often mean well when giving you relationship advice, note that they only advice you based on their own experience the half story you give. I met a group of four friends that established by 30 they would be married and now they are all married. I also met a group of men in late thirties that are more interested in flirting.
Assessment: How is your relationship and how is that of your friend?

Innovation of the day

Obiwezy phone swap.

Imagine being able to swap your phone with extra cash for a new phone.

When I saw this I said to myself, Whao! How innovative people can be.

Founders Obafemi Onanuga and Ajibade Oluwatosin started at the popular Computer Village in Lagos. “People know us as the guys to consult when you want to buy top quality used phones that would give you peace of mind,” said Oluwatosin.

This is a normal thing in computer village, being able to swap phones but bringing this initiative online in a classy way, I must say Kudos!

Rihanna sues Topshop for using her picture...lol!

I just read online that Rihanna sued  Arcadia(parent company of topshop) of £3.3million ($5.5million) for unauthorized usage of her picture to design the above top.

lol! I bet she has to come to Nigeria to sue the whole Aba boys.

Movie Review! TAKEN 3

Hey people this movie is a must watch. On wednesday i went to the movies( gdc lekki) to see the movie "Taken 3" showing at 6.55pm.

I got there at 6.30 but viola it was sold out, then i remembered its wednesday (#700) and all the awoof people like me had finished the ticket.

So on thursday, i set out early and lucky me i got a ticket.

Well the movie is mind blowing and i must say i await "Taken 4"

Wedding colour, Me like!!!

I saw this picture of my friend’s wedding and I like it. I like the silver/purple decoration (They didn’t do justice to the gele though).

Not like I did not see many weddings in December 2014-january 2015. But when I saw this I just couldn’t stop smiling, Congrats Julie, wish you the very best in you marriage.

NEW YEAR! 2015

I have been slacking oooo!, on and off. Sometimes i wonder that maybe am just more confused than i think. Today am doing this, tomorrow something else.

 Well! For this year i have resolved i must be making a post on macksita.blogspot.com atleast once in two days, God helping me (yes na only God go give me strength and wisdom).

 Looking forward to a wonderful 2015.

 PS: Thats the best picture i could come up with. I love tulips.